khankis
OK, I see a situation where there are a number of posts and nobody knows which one has been updated without clicking on each one of them and then "refreshing".
SO I have hit upon this absolute genius of a brainwave - ADDA will be for chatting as we did at the clinic, and we can all refer to this post first. Whoever adds anything interesting on any of the other posts will have to add a comment on ADDA informing us. This way, we will save a lot of time.
I also notice a decline in the number of comments and non participation from some khankis, eg. Sheila feeler, Texy, Holyjoe, Osho (pbuh) and of late Banglu.
What's up with you guys? Texy, are you so busy hacking into the CIA, Mossad, and MI5 computers that you don't have time to spare a lousy comment on khankis? Just look at Passion Flower - when he's not playing golf with Dubya, he's yachting with Khashoggi, or jetsetting all over the world, yet he finds time to add his shitty comments.
Osho (pbuh) - we humbly wait for your comments. Please bless us with a word or two.
Sheila Feeler - Please come back from your sanyas and send in a joke or something.
Banglu - Get back from your sabbatical ASAP.
Holyjoe - incase you are reading this - Do try and send in a comment by Christmas.
Passion Flower, Dusty Balls, Coconut scrapers, Goltalab, and Slob deserve a word of praise. Incase you guys want to take sabbaticals, please ensure that you plan it out in such a way that only one of you goes.
Oh I forgot Hatchhole, and DungDung - What should I tell these two parachutes? Your comments.....
86 comments:
Dome - good idea and welcome back. I hope everything is fine and back to normal. I do hope that you Mumbaikars are not going to go back to your resilient selves and say " oh well , I suppose nothing will be done anyway so lets just continue as we were before Terrible Tuesday."
PF - please explain your comment on the RLD post - whats a "black shebbath"
All is well again. The trains on the Central Railway are still not operational in some places, so timings are not adhered to and naturally, no seats available.
On Saturday, a man left his house in Jogeshwari in a bad mood. He had just stabbed his dad. He left to move around the city and cool off. At the gateway, two Manipuri girls who worked at Le meridien were taking advantage of the long weekend ( with 15th August) and had decided to take snaps of themselves at the gateway, and feed pigeons. It so happens that this chute had not cooled of, and was still in a very bad mood, so he just caught hold of one of the girls and slit her throat 3 times. Then he decided to kill her friend and hence stabbed her a number of times. The first girl naturally bled to death right there at the Gateway,( the papers were full of the shockingly gruesome images) and her friend is in a critical condition.
He then went towards some cops and was arrested. The papers are now talking about how he must a schizo, and must have "heard some voices in his head" etc etc.
That's the latest news from the "city that never sleeps."
Fact is truly stranger than fiction:
A gangster from Mumbai who has been externed,to some village about 100 km away, has STOLEN A BRIDGE. Yep, you read right, he needed money so he and his friends went and cut up the only bridge ( 100 m long) connecting the village to 3 other villages and sold the bridge, which weighed in at quite a few tonnes, for scrap.
This was noticed "soon" and MIDC inspectors noticed a few pieces of the bridge hidden behind some trees. This led to meeting with villagers who spilled the beans.
Any wonder it's the city that never sleeps? Mad fuckers stabbing you for feeding the pigeons, crazy buggers stealing bridges.... What's worse is that all this madness is not restricted to Mumbai....ex-Mumbaikars all over the world have been seen staring up in the sky in the hope of seeing a pair of shiny balls...they keep muttering and heaping abuse on a guy named Slob.
PF, Banglu and DB - will you fuckers stop posting comments on any other thread. Its getting messy and confusing. Dome has started this thread so we can hang out and stick our two-paise bits here.
Once again :
Nostalgia stories goes to the "Nastalgia contd" thread;
Any update on RLD's - for eg. when did you first wank off - goes to the RLD thread ;
All jokes and that means ALL JOKES ( for Banglus benefit ) goes to the Cutva Pashting thread.
Khankis , lets have some ORDER IN THE FUCKING HOUSE !!
Thank you slob.
Once and for all you shithead:
1. Jokes in the Phor....
2. Nostalgia related stuff on Nostalgia Contd.
3. ANy wishes for RLD on RLD.
4. A mention of what you have pasted on the above posts to be posted as a comment on Adda.
5. If you want to just maro adda, then welcome.
Hope clear now??? If not, please let me know which of the above sentences you do not understand. I'll try and oblige with a diagram or something.
It's finally happened! Our blog is now listed. If you do a google search for khankis, on the second page you will find the hallowed name of our blog.
Hello folks!
Bungloo - nice song!
PF - We know you played football with Tony Blair and you could have been playing second fiddle to Bill Gates and you've probably played saxophone on Bill Clinton but you know what will really impress us? FIND GEORGE JENNINGS!
Slob- nice Uluberia pics.
Sheila - Sorry to hear about Cheryl. Am trying to scan the mortuary card and post it so all can see but so far I'm unable. How's Sera..please keep us updated....you probably think we can do sweet bugger all so it doesn't matter but you'll be surprised...so keep us posted ok?
CS - Sorry about the earlier confusion about "Brian's" daughter...you can thank ol' Slobby for that.
Holy Joe,Dry Chappati and all you other chutes!(you're all obviously dead)- those of you who have reached heaven ...pray for us...those who have gone to hell ...you deserve it ..roast you bastids!
Goltalab - I have some very gooood news for you...but later!
Osho(Pam pam paraah!)- I've been scanning all these posts for some mention of how we are all (stupidly) living in the past and so on, but you have obviously decided to let sleeping dogs lie...ha ha! See you sometime in the future!
AND NOW FOR ALL OF YOU WHO HAVE PATIENTLY WAITED (FOR YEARS) FOR THIS JUICY, LONG AWAITED NEWS......
DOME'S BELOVED AND OUR MOST HATED FRIEND FR. PAT "CADBURY" EATON HAS BEEN SUSPENDED!!
Who wants to know the details? he he!
Oh Please Please PLEASE TELL US!
Where the fuck do you dream up such funny stories? It was hilarious.
My hair stands at the coincidance of the fact that this guy "khan" could be related to another guy who was after Dome for stealing his girl.
That guy's name was "Kwan".
This guy had apparantly gone on tour for his company and while he was away , Dome decided to put his finger in the pie, so to speak.
Anyway when "kwan" came back and heard the rumour mills grinding, he got so furious that he came on his scooter one night while Texy, DD, Mangoskins ,Helmethead and Slob were about to sign off outside Das Brothers on Ripon St . He was shouting the same kinda things the other "khan" was saying , "RANDY KA AUWHLAAD MAI WALTER KO DEKHNEH AYA HOO!
VO SALA MERA CHOKRI KO OONGLI LAGAYA AUR CHUMMA DIYA " ETC . Of course part of it was in Chinese so it came out like " You fucking ilyamakatolay , you fucking inchemai etc.
And brandishing a small chaku,he let it swipe and poor Texy, who was nearest , got a cut on his arm.
Dome of course, being the funk he is , a la my earlier narrative about the puppy, didn't show his face for the next one month and we had to send him messages informing him if the coast was clear.
Considering your verbose rebuttal in the "bushisms" thread , it just proves and validifies Dome's definition of an "Intellectual" which we assume your purporting to be.
Also mate, I dont know about your coffee dispenser or water cooler discussions when you were working in Cal ( which co. did you work for , btw ) but I cant remember having any discussions about soccer,politics or the economy during my working life in Cal. All we discussed were chicks, parties, movies , music and which tea joint we were meeting at during the day.
I was not into politics at all, in fact really didnt give a fuck who was PM or CM or any fuckin M. Fact being I've never voted in my life.
Consider this : we've all grown up now ( cant vouch for Banglu though ) , we have our families , we are all gainfully employed , none of us are drug addicts or alcoholics ( again cant vouch for Banglu ) , we are leading fairly decent lives , both socially and economically and we struggle a bit like normal human beings.
We've set up this blog to keep in touch, share a few jokes , laugh at some old memories , show our concern if somebody's having a bad time and basically remain the friends we were while growing up.
So , buddy, lets have some news about your family, how's Christian doing, whats Heather upto, how are your folks, share with us what you did over the weekend.
Lets not have pseudo-intellectualisations about politics or the economy or the state of India during Gandhi's tenure. Simply because we dont give a fuck.
My apologies for this long comment but I sorta noted a hurt in your last post. Sure ,life is too short and we haven't changed, but mate - do you really want us to ? Have you ?
The floor is yours , buddy .
Nostalgia contd has been updated with THE PLACEBO EFFECT
PF - I fully agree with Slob. I too noted a trace of hurt in your last post. All I have to say is Lighten up. We are all having fun here at each other's expense ( sometimes), but then, that was what we did when we hung out on Ripon St.
I dont know about the others, but like Slob, I too don't give a fuck about Gandhi or the state of the economy.
BTW, Dubya wasnt voted president by the majority of Americans. If it wasnt for little bro Jeb, and the chad, he would have eaten humble pie.
As for the remark about KHAN/KWAN, I found it really funny. Lawrie, the answer is Yes. But that does NOT mean that you need to do anything about it.
Incidentally, I did not even know that Kwan had slashed Texy and DD, because I was in Ramona's house.
As for the other incident Banglu mentioned, yes again. The guy's name was Nigel, and he was fgriendly with a girl called Wendy David from Entally. She was a very flirty bitch with an ass to die for.I used to go with DD to Loreto entally to follow her home everyday. DD the devil even made me follow her one day inside 184 Lower Circular Rd where she had gone for a burial. Throughout the burial she kept smiling at us, and was caught by her BF nigel, which is why he had to be told. Nigel used to work out at Muslim Inst, so we were friends. There were never any hard feelings between us.
Slob, Dome LIGHTEN UP! You want to see the PF wilt or something? He has contacted or is seriously working hard to contact George Jennings (PF - remember this is a guy WE used to know .... not George Bush or King George OK? This bloke is more like ..."FUCKS GEORGES!" right!).
BTW, have you read the latest Roget's Thesaurus?
Dome - it's good there were no hard feelings between you and Nigel as that would have been traumatic for poor Wendy.
Find it hard to believe you were hiding from Khan Kwan at Romona's place.... how did manage with her giant friggin' dog? (a la carte/ala o akbar Slob's Goa puppy story?)
Bungloo gaandu! Happy birthday for the 29th....we shall go for mass at the crack of dawn to thank God for our sweet little Stevie blah, blah, blah
Unfortunately, Fr. Pat "Cadbury" Eaton will be unable to say the mass as he has been SUSPENDED!!!!
Osho (Pam Pam Paraah!!!)knows all the gory details and he will have to run the risk of being called a stupid childish idiot living in the past as I now call upon him to give you a blow by blow account(don't worry Dome it's not what you're thinking) of what happened.
BTW PF, follow this carefully.....this was all the politics we ever cared about.
(Judging from everyone's reaction, this is probably still the only politics we care about!)
Bunglu, this is different from the Polly Ticks you could be affected with in Pat Pong..
slob, i remember the incident with mark kwan - i still bear a scar showing 3 stiches
i was sitting behind sheilaf on a yezdi - the knife was actually intended for sheilf. however, he bobbed out of harm's way and i got slashed on the wrist
sheilaf then raced me to dr halib who suggested we go to campbell hospital where i was stiched up rather crudely
for canada's sake, I hope mark kwan is not as wild as before, btw, he has never apologised to me but then I suppose that's the type of bloke we are dealing with
I beleive all of the above was becoz dome was supposedly chasing lynette saldanha, i think and mark believed sheilaf was partly responsible
dome, where the hell were you, out of town i suppose
I said before, I was at ramona's. Don't you remember? You and Brian G came over to tell me about it that very evening. DD also told me not to go to Church to search for a few Sundays, since Kwan would make it a point to try and cut me up, (as if that would undo what had already happened with his girl.)That's the reason that Slob felt that I had disappeared.
Nice to hear from you Texy. Been a long time.
DB, why don't you please tell us about Pat Eaton's suspension?
Osho (pbuh) may take too much time.
Banglu - before we forget, Many Happy Returns of the day for the 29th. Have a drink or two on my behalf. That joke about Birbal and Tansen was great. Since when have you learnt to speak such good Gujju and Hindi?
PF and DB , maybe you f-f-f-ff-fuckers can take your argument about F-f-f-f-faq-faq-faqrudin Ali Ahmed to the Scandals/Politics/Rants thread that Dome has started. There you guys can thrash it out as to who declared emergency and who was supposed to , while the rest of us guys can rest peacefully in the other threads. When you guys have finished , pls post a comment here so we know.
Hey Banglu, you fucking phlegmy piss fart bokachoda, here's wishing ya a very happy b'day for tmw. I know you'll probably be drinking yourself to a trance , may visit Patpong for a fuck or wherever else you get your meat , but , buddy, don't lose your way home , ya hear me now !
Throw some bread crumbs outta the taxi so ya know which lane to direct the cabdriver on your way back. Mili sends her wishes too and worries that you listen to Black Sabbath early in the fuckin morning. Any way, Iron Man , dont get Paranoid. Just enjoy your day.
Well boys, I have a problem, Slob, please don't laugh, but my computer has got a virus and needs to reformatted. So I may not be available for a few days. Hijack This and Norton antivirus are just not working. My internet usage shows zillions of bytes going out when I haven't even started to surf.
One other thing which I thought I shud tell you'll was what happened on the 26th of July when it rained in Mumbai - I found it funny but with so much serious stuff being put out on the rains, just did not mention this:
While I was walking in waist deep water in one of the many lanes near Kurla, ( hundreds of us were walking in ) I thought it was scary because some of the manhole covers were forced out by the high tide, there was also a current in the water. Anyway I just kept on walking hoping for the best when from behhind me I heard a tiny voice saying " mera haath pakroge?" Not believing what I heard I just carried on trudging, when I heard that voice ( male) saying " Bhaisaheb, mera haath pakarke chaliye na." I turned around and saw a shortish guy, who was having trouble keeping up with us and the current. He asked me again if we could hold hands and walk since it would be safer for both of us! Immediately,I thought of you guys and was really happy that none of you were witness to that. Needless to say, I told him not to get scared and just carry on walking.
Now that was extremely callous of you, Dome.
The poor fucker wasn't asking you to hold his hand and tickle his palm !
His idea was genuine and I think you should have held his hand. What if he or you suddenly fell into a manhole or a deep gudda, what then.
Also you shud heed your own advise and stick to old material instead of venturing into the unknown in the hope of finding something new.
Re formatting only takesa couple of hours so u shud be back soon.
dome, sorry mate, can't remember all the things that happened about 18 years ago - a bloody long time
u need to use hijack this in safe mode, u also may need to tell hijack this to delete certain files on next startup as u cannot delete files that are in use, prior to all of above, turn off system restore in xp
one simple way to finding files that have been recently added is by checking:
documents and setting\your user folder\local settings\temp
sort by "date modified", you will in all probabilty see some files with strange/meaningless names, u need to get rid of these, there will also be a DLL of some sort, eg se.dll in either c:\windows or c:\windows\system
hijack this usually lists the offending exceutable and dll when u do a scan
ofcourse, the quickest way is reformat your hardx drive but u risk losing stuff that u might need
i suggest ghosting your hard drive (using Symantec Ghost or similar program) as soon as u insall the o/s and all your required drivers
this way you can quickly rebuild yr machine in a few minutes
looks like u guys had a terrible time with those floods, hope things are back to normal by now
banglu happy b'day mate - keep the jokes flowing
hi to the rest of the gang
Welcome to Chris Singh. That story was hilarious. I dont remember too much of it, but starkly recall Fog Horn's black face turning white as his eyeballs when those guys turned up.
Chris , since you have burnt yourself in the khanki trial by fire with that gem of nostalgia , may I suggest we rename you with a khanki handle - lets see, I recall you were a thinnish guy, with a hips-out-in-front type of posture - like you were telling the world to blow you - so to speak. Also you had a penchant for satchels and sandals.Correct me if I'm wrong, but anyway , with that info in mind how about we call you - TeswaJoota.
Khankis - your thoughts.
Ok now that I have ya'lls attention , here goes :
PF - what exactly is a "JW". Also , have you found George Jennings yet ? Get on with it, use your political clout and and weed him out of the woodwork.Give my regards to Heather. How's Christian doing ?
DB - where's the promised revelation about CadburyHead's suspension. Osho, the "mature" parachute is keeping away from the blog with his "living in the present" attitude methinks because he wants the sleeping dogs of his past to keep sleeping , as too much info of his harried pre-Chris life - as is wont to happen - could be opening a can of worms he wouldn't want exposed. So lets not wait for him, spit it out , we'd all like to know how the bane of our existance during our camp and retreat years has finally got his own.
How are Mary and the girls doing ? If you meet Rehan , tell him i remember our days when I would accompany him when he used to slyly meet his wife at a restaurant on CIT Rd.
Dome - have you any answer to the between-the-lines accusation the khankis are making that maybe - just maybe - you are a closet faggot. After all, it has been proven in psychology that we tend to externally reject vehemently that part of our personality we are most ashamed of.
Anyway, hows Dylan,Keenan and Charmaine. Hope the kids have kept themselves away from harmful foods.
Banglu - heard from DB you are in Cal. Do give my regards to your family.
Texy - nice hearing from you , but can we hear more or do you only pop up like a pop-up only when there's some techy troubleshooting to be done. DB, CS and myself have all expressed interest in wanting to see some latest snaps of yourself - again may I remind you , not of you wanking off in bed , but the decent ones.
Goltalab - I trust you have straightened the crick in your neck and diverted your gaze earthwards. To be fair, I would go out, too, every night and look to the east but failed to see Mars. Why dont you try convincing that brother of yours to take some time out and get a computer set up , with an email connection , so he can join us occasionally . I know he's busy corrupting the primary school students of Alma Mater, but hey we're busy too , ya know - ok maybe not that busy - but still !
Give my love to Penny. How are the kids doing ?Also A.Marie. She must be enjoying herself thoroughly. I remember in the old days, we would land up in the Coelho's house after carol singing , do our three carol set outside their flat and then go inside , have coffee and split the dough amongst ourselves. The Coelhos always gave us Rs.100. We each ended up with enough dosh to finance ourselves a ticket for the GAB dance . We were real mercenaries, weren't we? no thought at all for the poor .
Mangoskins - hows your daughter? Trust she is better and everything has cooled down for you. I have been getting your replies to my email jokes , but no sign of you on the blog. Give us word or two, will ya! Tell Zilfa to get out her Biryani recipe as she may need it soon.
Coconutscrapers, I recd a mail from Aruna - surprise ! surprise!
She was checking her mails from a cafe as the comp at home is still screwed. They seem to be doing fine. How are you and your family. How many holidays do you go on. Everytme I send you a mail it comes back saying you are out of the office and will be back after 3 days. Take care anyway.
Slob, My family is fine, though Dylan has asthma and requires an inhaler twice a day.
My reformatting work is done.
As for the "closet faggot" thing, if I was one, I would have had more brains than to tell you people about the little rain incident.
BTW, since when has Chris/Kris joined Khankis? I don't recall seeing any post from him?
Where has PF mentioned JW's? Why the fuck can't I see these?
I agree with you about Texy and Sheiler Feeler and Osho (pbuh).
Texy, why the hell have you created a blog when all we see there is your name?Let's have some pix.Show us your house, place of work, some sights etc.
Ok Ok, I did see Chris' comments. A big welcome Chris! Yes, your name HAS to change to something really really demeaning. I request everyone including you to come up with some names.My suggestion - AQUAHOLIC.
We hope this is not a flash in the pan and that you will continue to grace us with your comments as long as possible.
I remember Ashit Burman - what a crash! Does anyone else remember that crash?
PF where have you mentioned JW?
Pl go to Nostalgia Contd for an update on Holyjoe.
slob, dome n pf - i spoke to SheilaF yesterday - he told me that mark kwan is still in cal with his wife lynette
so PF, the mark kwan in canada must be someone else
dome, good to see your pc is up and running - will endeavour to post some pix soon
Hello confused bokas!
Mark Kwan (Mark the knife) married Lynette Saldanha right?! Slob was actually the prick who got Dome into the fucked up situation. Well all you buggers in Phoren you may rest peacefully. To the best of my knowledge he's still in Cal.....guess who caused all this confusion? Here's a hint...his brain is on vacation(company sponsored, probably)and his mouth is working overtime!
BTW, those fucked up sandals of Chris are called "Quo Vadis"....just thought this info might come in useful in the naming ceremony.
Banglu, I think "lundslinger" is a suitable name as it aptly describes Chris' posture. Chris if you're reading this , please approve - well .....we dont need your approval - on second thoughts, just change your fucking handle , all right !
By the way, I cant remember Janet and Lorraine. Goltalab seems to know them.
DB, how the fuck was I responsible for Dome putting his finger in Kwan's pie. All I did was invite the fucker as one of my friends for a birthday party. It was coincidence that both Dome's and Lynette's b'day are on the same date. That was the one thing that led to the other things and with Kwan being out of town not helping the situation , the lights being dimmed and the strains of Stevie Wonder's " I just called to say I love you" floating in the air, it was just fate that put Lynette in the arms of Dome and ....well we know the rest.
Also , as far as I can recall, Mark/Lynette are still in Ripon Lane close to where Michael Carneiro's brother used to stay.
Btw, "nostalgia cuntd" has been updated.
I agree , that fuckin bhurmarani got our tongues dripping with the news of Cadburyhead's suspension and then allovasudden vanishes into the woodwork with not even a byyourleave deegating Osho , of all people,to give us the low down. Knowing fully well that Osho, in his current state, does not want to be seen anywhere near this blog for fear Dome will let some ole cats out of his bags.
DB , I'm afraid you've let the khankis down, repent for this sin by finding out the lyrics to the bong song we used to sing in school with Pendulum Bob. That is your task.
It went saomething like this - "shambho, maitri, oiko-o prabadhi ...."
Since lundslinger has fallen asleep waiting for someone to do a take on the Baldy episode, let me regale you'll with a baldy tale from the past.
The scene is at the retreat hall in Dhyan Ashram where assorted Khankis had congregated for a silent retreat.The previous night while sneaking around in the dark Banglu accidently bumped into a broom bin and all hell broke loose. There was mad scattering of the nightowls hither and tither looking for holes to sneak into while the probing torch of Fr Remedious sought out the said culprit. Meanwhile someone had tied Baldy's undies to the flagpole and he was not very amused.
Anyway , fastforward to next morning and Baldy, Fr.Remedious and I think Neville Noronha were berating us about the previous night's shenanigans. We bokas of course had baby-innocent countenances pretending this was the first we were hearing of such goings-on.
Tuning in to Baldy he was saying , " Do you people think I'm a lump of shit ?"
To which a quick retort from the midst of the audience, " No father , we dont think, WE KNOW!"
Hello fellow Chodurampalbuxawallahs!
This fucking laurah connection is pissing me off!! I post comments everyday but just as I deside to "publish" this bastard decides to "hang" like a spent dick!
There i feel better already!
OK here goes.....Bungloo never showed up for our meeting in Cal... must be shitting his pants.
Slob, for my penance...
Shammo moitree aiko progoti (UUAAN TOO!)
Shantinare pottho dhorey
Amra choleychi amra cholbo
Joog jugontho dhorey
amader maajhey nayee bade ah bade
keechoo
kayee choto boro nayee kono uuchuu neechuu
Sara dee shaer manush kay amra rekhaychee moitree dhoray
amra cholaychee amra cholbo joog joogontho dhorey
BTW, what the fuck are you up to?
Obviously you're bulllshitting those poor Kiwi fuckers that you're Robby Thakur's great grand nephew or something.
Just to strenghten that why don't you launch into this one...
Goyo tribonayr dayshayr pataka
tomakay nomoshkar (2)
Dollay dollay jaanay kreepaney kreepaney(2)
bareetay jhonotkar
goyotribonay dayshayr pataka tomakay nomosh kar
This is a slow ballard very easy to learn (every friggin' word is repeated) and very emotional...I don't know what the fuck it means though but I'm sure you'll think of something.
And now the moment you've all been waiting for..........
THE CUNTERBURY TALES (formerly published as THE TALE OF THE CUNT WE'D ALL LIKE TO BURY)
Foreword(foreplay for the Broadway version): Now Lund (we're on first name terms ...he calls me Dusty) has buggered the story a bit by jumping the fucking gun instead of waiting for the official release of the original edition, remixed and remastered by the best in the business, iced with fresh steaming bullshit and garnished with just the right amount of over-exaggeration that is only possible by yours truly!
Anyway, let's see what I can do to right this situation.
Once upon a short time ago, the Mass Communications Department decided to have a "freshers'" welcome. It was a nice party with lots of booze, smokes and nice chested popos. Everyone was having a swell time drinking, smoking and groping. There were Bungloo types who were walking around saying, "Kaya mama an' da buddha bless you!" There were Lund types getting pissed on sugar and salt solutions. There were Slobby buggers yelling "where are my chops?"(watch out for linked story)...well everybody was having a good time ....then, one chick decided to fuck up a good show by refusing to drink, smoke or poke.
Now there were some turd year assholes who decided that they should force feed her some booze. En Masse they piled on even though Ms. Goody communicated to them that they should depart...she meant it! ( I know that was pretty knobby but that's to entertain the really dumb buggers)
Well the party finally ended and everybody departed...the Bungloos to heaven/nirvana/ahimsa, the Lunds to the loo to retch etc., etc.,and etc!(watch out for linked story)
Now Goody stumbled home at 3 am and in a perfect duplication of our very own Hatchole...BLUUAAARGH!!...she puked all over the imitation Persian carpet in the living room.
Her parents awoke to find her smashed out on the dining table.
They immediately (about six and a half hours later)marched her down to good ol' Nihil Ultra and breezed into the Staff room/office and gave Cadbury a rollicking bollocking!
"Father I hold you (apologies to Dome and any other lovers)totally responsible for my daughter's condition!" said the Pop.
A wild look of despair came into Baldy's beady eyes.
"She's drunk!" yelled the mother.
Baldy heaved a sigh of relief as the colour came back to his bald pate.
The parents raged on while a small group comprising Profs, B.Com buggers trying to get the fuck out, B.A. buggers trying like fucks not to get in and other sundry buggers started gathering around. There was an atmosphere of hope...hope that Pat would finally get what we all know he deserves!
Now, Pat had not been invited (as usual)and the party had not been within the hallowed halls of the ol' Alma Mater so technically it was not his problem and as you might have guessed, Pat suddenly assumed his familiar "I don't give a fuck" attitude, turned his eyes up to heaven, cocked his head on one side, headed his cock off to the other side and in his squeaky voice launched into a tirade about "manifestaion of the upbringing", "history repeating itself"(here he got a glazed look in his eye and I have a feeling that that remark had more to do with us than Goody's parents), he spoke of "bad breeding" and worked himself up to such a pitch that he finally flew around his desk, rapped poor Goody twice as he screamed "You Slut! You Slut! Why have you forsaken me!" which means "You bitch you have disgraced the college with your whoring ways!"
There was a sharp intake of breath from the crowd which now comprised a sea of men (henceforth referred to as the Semen), women and children, the Sanhedron, the Chief priests elders and a Scribe from the Times of India.
Goody's parent were aghast,"Did you see that?" they asked the Semen.
"CRUCIFY HIM! CRUCIFY HIM!" they shouted.
So Goody's gang stormed out (the same way they had breezed in) in search of a cross. Unfortunately their seach led them across the road to the police station where they laid down charges of asault and battery, defamation of character, molestation, religious fanatacism, arson (they thought since Pat was behaving like an arse it was justified) etc., etc., and etc.(linked story coming soon)
Pat in the meanwhile cut through the Semen and reappeared in the Mass Com class where he suspended everybody forever and ever because they were fucked up from before they were born and it shows in their genes (or did he mean jeans). Then he turned on his heel, nearly fell on his arse, and somehow made his way back to the action joint.
When he arrived at his office (which was tough since the Semen had now swelled to about five thousand in number, not counting women,children, five barley loaves and two fishes)he was mildly amused to see two large Bihari blokes rubbing up some khaini and letting go loud obnoxious farts.
"YEHI HAI LA HO?" said Behari Lal
"HA YEHI HAI! LAY JAO USSEY!" yelled the Semen
[for those of you who have forgotten the language I will translate - THIS IS THE WHORE NO? YEAH DIS DA FUCKER! CRUCIFY HIM! GIVE US BARABBAS!]
"ABBEY CHAL! BABU BOOLA BHA TARO!" said Behari Bal, shoving some snuff up his hairy nose, sneezing and farting like a bull walrus in heat.
Our Whinger Turtle Pat turned pale and looked at the Profs for support..."they can't do this can they? Have they brought a warrant? I'M A PRIEST!" he cried.
"TOO LATE FOR THAT ARSEHOLE!" cried the Semen
Professor Tankha spoke up.
"Bring me a bowl of water," he said. " I wash my hands off this case...he had it coming!"
"Et too Brute?" said Pat, a tear rolling down one cheek. (there may be something between these two.... oh shit! sorry Dome!)
"BAAND KAY LAY JAAO!" yelled the Semen
However, Prof. Gomes/ Rozario (one of those Taltala kill-joy pricks) stepped up, "Father I would die for you (like Bryan Adams) before I let these cocks crow three times!" Then he whispered something to the Behari brothers and Pat was marched off to the thana. (sadly though, there were no handcuffs or rope around the waist.)
Suddenly a SCORPIO (jeep type thingy driven by deadly blokes) screeched to a halt scattering the semen hither and thither. As the dust settled the door opened and two short little paws swung out.....a hushed silence fell upon the crowd as Rev. P.C. Matthew jumped to the ground.
He waddled into the office and got about a million versions of what had happened and a trillion opinions about what he should do.
He bent down and wrote in the dust.
Then he spoke,"truly, truly I say to thee you can't send a priest, nay a Jesuit to the lock up....I shall have to make a few calls and give a couple of admissions to solve this problem."
He made the calls and turned around with a satisfied smile ...which soon turned to a sneer as he noticed the Semen.
"what is going on I ask?" he asked.
"We are boycotting classes till Baldy is hung and quartered!" replied the thinning Semen.
"If I catch any boy (or girl/homo/moga etc.)cutting or cotting classes I'll perssssonally sssee to it that he confined to quarters!" he said and one by one the semen threw down their stones and walked away.
Epilogue: Years later....P.C. Matthew retired to his village in Kerela(which he now owns except for a small hamlet of Gauls or is it Bauls). Profs and all retired or at least tired. Semen and scraped through college and have joined the rat race around the globe. Goody has become a alcoholic and has married one of the Gropers.
Pat of course has come back from suspension and has become as pissing off and as full of himself as ever.
But one small group who call themselves Khankis(formerly known as Juvenille Delinquents) refuse to let sleeping dogs lie (they have sworn to make every sonofabitch speak the truth,the whole truth and nothing but the truth). And so they have a reunion party where they regroup for one final laugh.
They con Pat into attending the party (with the help of Bungloo's mum or Errol's dad or Phillip's inlaws ....)and they roll around the floor splitting their sides and pissing their pants as one very serious person (I propose Jenny Coelho who I hope is in the wings somewhere) pretends to be sympathetic and quizzes (Osho back off)Pat about the incident.
P.S. Look out for my forthcoming title "GOLGOTHA - THE SKULL RIDES AGAIN" ... a story of Pat's return.
Hi Khankis,
This is Penny here. Got curious about the website after hearing about it from Gavin and thought I would visit. I enjoyed my refresher course in Hindi gaalis
Actually, I want to bring a topic of discussion to the table – a topic very dear to my heart. All you khankis in phoren lands, your input would be greatly appreciated. Actually, could do with opinions from those in the home country too. Would any of you currently living abroad retire in India? Gavin & me have been in Canada 8 years – it has been a rollercoaster ride. We have adjusted well to life here but the thought of living here in my old age scares me. My dream is to retire in Goa (definitely not Calcutta – not a city for the old folks), but Goa would be perfect. Now am I living in a fool’s paradise or is this doable? I wait for pearls of wisdom and gems of insight from the Khankis.
Dome, great work on the site. It sure is wonderful to read all those imaginative, creatively worded stories of the past (amazing how they change depending on who the raconteur is!). I have great memories of St.Mary’s clinic, college, etc. especially when we girls challenged the boys to a quiz contest – Barry O’Brien was the QM and we held it at St.Mary’s…..needless to say, we beat the boys hollow – Osho, Brian retain information??
DB - welcome back, and all is forgiven. BTW a small correction in the song of Chitto Roy - The 2nd last line starts with "Shara Bishwer Manushke Amra .....".
One clarification - When you mentioned that Pat's eyes rolled towards heaven - can you be a bit more specific and tell us which eye?
Penny - Hi! Goa is a lovely place especially for retired folks. But what about your children? Have you thought of other alternatives - like OZ, South of France, Greece etc etc? I feel that Calcutta is a nice place to retire.
LS, thanks for the input. Banglu, now I know why hubby dear spends hours in the bathroom, but I'd still rather have them frozen than completely melted off as I believe happens in HOT, tropical countries...DB, Dome confirmation anyone???
Dome, Slob I'm doing fine and the kids keep me busy. I still detest the winters (sooo long and soooo cold), but not sure if we have enough energy or will to start fresh in another country again. Will try to post some pics of the family later.
My dear Gaandus,
For years I've been trying to find out WHO THE FUCK IS ALICE and now there's an ANONYMOUS roaming around this blog....a penny for you thoughts on this.
Goltalab, Penny thinks she finally knows the reason why you spend hours in the loo ...which means your mags are still safe.
PF I'm seeking freedom at the rate of 55....it's a lot cheaper than anything else on the market.
Lund, you must read everything from the beginning...go back to and through all the archives;
maybe then you will not get so excited about PF's irrational, extravagant suggestions.
Remember he once invited us all over for a reunion to CANADA!
BTW PF I hope you're not trying to sell off the old cemetary!
Penny, what do you mean you'd rather have them frozen than melted off? As far as I know you're not supposed to have any at all!
DB , you have redeemed yourself with that hilarious take on the Baldy episode. BTW, from where the hell did you manage to dig out the lyrics to the bong song. I can't believe you actually remember the words.
LundS, thanx for changing your blog handle. You are now officially a fucking bokarampalchodubhurmaranimakabur khanki.
Osho , Osho , Osho , the Lord has risen - from the rathole of voyeuristic anonymity to blog participation. Here's a riddle for you - a 98kg man needs to get 3 gold bars weighing 1kg each across a narrow bridge. Howver the rickety bridge can only take 100kgs max . Anthing more would cause the bridge to collapse. How does he get across.
Of course the rest of you bokas can have a go , too.
PF, I wonder the same as DB - hope your not sacking of the graveyard. What will happen to all the poor souls buried there.
Penny, believe it or not, I have been telling Mili ( my wife ) all along for the last one year , that we should think seriously of retiring in Goa. I think it is a very good idea. PF is right of course about our kids wanting to remain in the place of their birth as they would have gained an identity in that country and would feel foreign back in India.
The points to ponder are :
Home country provides familiarity and a sense of belonging.
Climate is more conducive to our liking especially as we grow older.
Financialy, if we have saved something , we could invest in property that could last a lifetime without heavy mortgages and crippling interest rates.
Lifestyle - we seem to be eking out a living here comfortably but cannot call it a luxurious life although we do go on holidays more often than when we were in India. Also, the creature comforts , like short commutes to work, good roads, fixed working hours ( for me thats definitely a positive as my job back in India had no fixed working hours and my home life suffered terribly )are taken for granted after a while and one may have to get used to not having these benefits in India. Of course , we are talking of retiring , but nevertheless if reasonably fit , I'm sure we could take up a part time job.
Over all however , my opinion is that, as PF suggested , a 6 month sabbatical in India during the cold months would be the ideal way of working around the problem of keeping in touch with our roots and having the best lifestyle our adopted countries offer us.
In fact when we were in India early this year, we had made a trip to Goa to visit Mili's aunt. While there we also had a look around at different areas in Goa, generally checking out facilities like church, market, proximity to city, beach etc. We found Miramar to be the ideal suburb to invest in and may take this to the next level when we go back again.
DB, What do you mean “not supposed to have them?” as ALL married men know – ownership transfers over to the wife as soon as the ring is slipped on her finger. Check with Banglu, he’s the only one who still has ‘em!
Slob, I’m glad you agree with me. I think that with every first generation Indian, the desire to go back to roots is very strong. Admittedly, I could never work in India again, have really got used to my flexible work arrangements and leaving exactly on time. As for the kids, as I always point out, we all left our parents and are now all around the globe, so what is the guarantee that my kids will still be in Toronto once they get older – they have a whole world to explore and as long as they know where to find me (Goa, India), it should work.
Anyway, take care everybody and enjoy your weekend, I’m out of the office in a couple of hours (work a half day on Fridays).
PF, I already live with a financial planner/advisor, so will take a rain check on your offer for now unless you can show me how to retire at 50 and still maintain homes in Goa, Canada, Mt.Tremblanc etc….
Hey Slobbo,
Whaddya think? I'm a good friend so as soon as I read your request I left my office and ran all the way to Howrah station. Then, I took a train to Bolpurand cycle rickshaw to Shantiniketan. I immediately went to Rabindra Bharati Univ., where I managed to find a tutor who taught me conversational bong within the next 4-5 hrs. Then I set out to find RT's next of kin. The prick happened to be living in Cal so I came all the way back and went to meet him. It turned out to be ...... PENDLAM BOB! I learnt the song and rushed back to send it to you. Unfortunately, i forgot to have it proof read by Dome which is why the 2nd last line is slightly buggered.....but the Kiwis wouldn't know the difference.
Anonymous I don't like your name or your lewd suggestions about fingers, rings and marriage.....
however I love your idea about Goa.
Also, I think you need to update your inventory of everyone's gulfarangees. I thought the rickshaw wallahs in Digha had confiscated Bungloo's.
Dome, are you editing some of the stuff I'm publishing? Why?
BTW my company has been bought by TATA and I'll be in Mumbai to meet Noel Tata and his gang. After I the meeting I will be a hotshot Tata employee with big bucks or I could be a footpathia, bekaar bum without a job (all khankis please pray)either way we could meet up for a drink (you can pay)to celebrate or to drown my sorrows.
I'll be in Mumbai 14th night to 16th night. What's your number?
dome
i have emailed the utility to your work email
now that POETS day has come to a close, hope all u khankis have a great weekend
DB - my no is 982044047. Lund, Though the rains are bad, I don't think we'll see another 26/7 for a long time. The Air India colony at kalina was my favorite haunt 15 years back. Andrea used to stay there.PF and Slob have been there too. I could not believe the devastation that happened there.
Dome,
thanks for the number. Will call you if and when I get a chance.
Ja Saala! I hadn't noticed the wrong number. Thanks Lund for pointing it out....maybe Dome is trying to avoid me because he might have to pay for the booze or because he might have to explain why he's editing some of my comments!
SOrry, Sorry, VERY sorry. Its 9892044047.I just noticed the mistake myself.
Banglu - 26/7 denotes 26th July, the day all hell broke loose in Mumbai.
Fr.Waverals favourite Catechism topic was " Acts of the Apostles" and his favourite line was ,"Buta Vy" - ( But why? )
Hello Chodus,
Remember a bloke called Michael Rao? Well this guy's a little bloke (even Mark Pinheiro used to tower over him)with glasses and an innocent face.
One fine day, in room no. 5.
Cathechism period...WAWA at the board writing "FACT FROM THE ACTS".
Every thing is nice and boring and we're all settling into a relaxed stupor when this goodboy bugger, Michael decides to earn our respect once and for all.
In FR. HEADMASTER's class he pulls out a roll of Cheena patakas (those little red crackers that you burst by hammering....you know the stuff they use in toy guns.)then he lays them on the ground and just as the two apostles are wandering around like lost fuckas on their way to Emmaus or Sonagacchi or wherever.....Mike grinds the heel of his "naughty boy" shoes .....PAATHAAAK! PHUTAAAK! PAATHAAK!
Wawa spun round like Sudden...almost fell off the platform and as he realised that nhe was not actually under attack, the fear left his eyes as they became mere slits scanning the group of Class 8 Catholic boys.
Then he gave his famous triangular smile and asked.."BUT VY?"
First he walked up to Slob but ol' Slobbo conveniently dropped his pencil and disappeared under the desk (good thing Robson was not teaching). Wawa sauntered across to a few more guys who used the usual diversionary tactics. Finally he came to our row...the source of the initial noise and even before he reached Stephen Concessio yelled out "it wasn't me!" Following his cue everyone steadfastly said'"it wasn't me!"
I ofcourse couldn't rumble with the rabble so I had to jazz it up a bit.."It wasn't me but I know who it was and I won't tell you!"
Man! was he pissed! "Get out! Get out!" he screamed.
From that day onward whenever Wawa walked in the room I left.
I never learnt any facts from the acts and all the other buggers envied me. Mike Rao will remain forever grateful and that would have been the end of the story except that Wawa decided to concelebrate my wedding mass.
My bestman (none other than Barry Saviel) had a ring time convincing me that I had to remain inside the church!
Dont know what PF and Osho are gaga-ing about the INXS show. First of all, if it weren't for Michael Hutchence fronting the band , there would not be an INXS. Secondly , now that he's dead, these guys are attempting to get a replacement for him through a TV reality show . That in itself is a no-no if any band takes hemselves seriously enough. Thirdly,except for a few songs , the rest of their repertoir is quite mediocre despite they being placed in the same class as U2 and Guns&Roses.
Fourth, these wannabe rock stars are sounding like INXS sycophants with their answers to the questions the band puts forth.
The contenders themselves are very talented and I feel are actually demeaning themselves and their talent by vying for an INXS front spot. Personally , I liked Deana ( sorry to see her go ), but Mig and JD are top two.
In the end , nobody really gives a fuck because INXS will probably select who they want. My bet is they'll go for Mig since he's got the look,the voice and performance class.
Hey Khankis, since we are all maroing adda here , I'd like to start a series called "associations". Here we will put down , musical, food , smells or any other sensory/memory associations we have with each other. Here is my list of musical associations with fellow khankis' homes :
Dome : LRB's Man on your mind.
DB : Average White Band's Cut The Cake
Banglu : Black Sabbath's Iron Man
Mangoskins : Don Maclean's American Pie
PF : Journey's Lights
Texy : Manfred Mann's Davy's On the Road
Hatchole/Goltalab : Doobie Brother's Minute by Minute
HolyJoe : Pink Floyds Shine On you Crazy Diamond
I can't remember listening to music at Osho's place.
YOu forgot Nights in white satin. For Texy - I remember him listening to songs like Mull of Kintyre by Mccartney and John Sutters Mill by England Dan and John Ford Cawley.
As for you - I BElieve, and The song by Journey which starts - "Just a small town girl......"
Dung Dung was associated with the first few bars of MasterBlaster ( Jammin).
Forgive me for sounding like a chute, but I just understood what you guys are talking about. Mike Hutchence - isn't he the guy who used to sing "Beautiful Gi-irl?"
Since I am into changing nappies and feeding/sterilising bottles etc I have not had time to watch the latest news / shows. But what you say is astounding. These guys are actually auditioning, on camera, for a replacement, like some beauty contest?
Banglu, that was some serious shit you wrote down and I totally agree.
Osho , PF - Just finished watching Rock Star INXS where Ty gets the axe. I agree with you guys the house band rocks and its fun watching really talented singers performing covers of the rock classics. Yesterday's renditions of Bohemian Rhapsody by Jodie and Marty's Pink Floyd classic Wish You were Here made my hair stand. Even JD's closure on his Elvis background with Suspicious Minds was excellent. MIG , of course is still my choice for the top spot , but what gets my goat is the fact that these singers have really got it , that X factor , that make them stars in their own right instead of fronting a has-been band like INXS.
Wonder if you guys have seen a movie called Rockstar with Mark Wahlberg. In this movie , Mark plays a wannabe rock singer who has all the chops and moves plus the voice and finally gets his dream realised when he is selected to front his favourite rock band. He enjoys the experience for a while but when he wants to contribute to lyrics and song ideas he is suddenly shunned and he at last realises that he's just a puppet in the hands of the rest of the guys and for them he's just the singer , thats it. He is not required to have any input in their songwriting. He , of course , quits in the middle of a gig and goes on to do his independant thing where he has more control and can portray his individuality.
I predict the guy who wins this is gonna end up like that, a puppet in the INXS resurrection venture.
And questions like " what can u bring to the band" and answers like "I'm an open book, you guys have got the experience , I'll show you what I've got " makes me cringe with embarassment. Michael Hutchence must be turning in his grave. Has anyone got the balls to say , " Fuckers, what I've got for your band is madness, also ballcrushing energy and the personality and endurance to lift your band out of the rut its found itself in " He would be my choice.
Also, BROOKE BURKE IS FUCKING HOT !
Banglu - How on earth did you associate me with Last Christmas and careless Whisper?
Osho ( pbuh) Since Slob just mentioned Bohemian Rhapsody and Wish U were here, I kind of got interested, so can you please tell me on which fucking channel all this is going on?
Also, this one is between you and me - song association - DD - I just called to say........ Remember??
That would be "Ohio". Yes, I remeber that song very well.Do you remeber those practices at ST Mary's? Does anyone remember the Parish Dinner?
You make it sound like only Christine and I supported the WINNER. And ofcourse as is your habit, you make it sound like you are the sole conscience keeper and voice of the teeming millions. Well, the millions of " fans around the world (including you)" can go fuck yourselves, because what matters is what INXS feels, and ofcourse what me and Christine feel about the winner.
Hello folks!
Dome - sorry we couldn't meet up...these pricks are workaholics!
I would like to propose OHIO as the Khanki anthem!
Who's this Brian Robertson?
Slobbo I think all this Chick Correa etc., sounds cool but all these Khankis need a hob up the arse if they associate you with anything other than "My Way" or "Hound Dog".
Osho/PF , you guys had to spoil it for me , what with all your discussions about the finale , I had to log on to the INXS site and find out that JD got the slot. I'm glad Marty did not get it as now he can tell INXS to shove it up and go on to better things with his Lovehammer band which I'm sure will sell heaps more records now.
Also glad this shit is over , although I will miss the house band and Brooke Burke.
Also, Osho , yes you're right about the poser. He had to juggle the three gold bars to get across. Took you a while though , didn't it !
And thanks for the B'Day wishes !!
A month early for me and TWO MONTHS early for Dome , but then your obviously not gonna be around till maybe X'Mas You planning a trip somewhere or what ?
Ref my thread on music associations : it was associations with your homes, not you. For eg, whenever I hear Cut The Cake by the Average White Band I remember DB's house as having first heard it there.
Now asociations with you guys individually would be more like :
DB : Spinning Wheel,Chains
Dome : Nights In White Satin, Ohio
Banglu : Iron Man , Paranoid
PF : Motley Crue's Jailhouse Rock
Yes, who the fuck is BrianRobertson??
I know somebody called Mangoskins !
DB ,its a shame you couldn't meet Dome , or were you apprehensive of the fact he may have made YOU buy dinner/drinks fearing Mumbai may suffer another deluge if he did.
Banglu, whats with this "If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there ,does it make a sound?" shit.
I have to agree with Osho and wonder if your popping pills or something !
Hang on - * pops a pill * OK now where were we, ah yes , If a tree fell in the forest and nobody was there , it would beg the question of whether the tree fell in the first place. Since we wouldn't know the answer to that, it making a sound would then be a superflous question, dont you think ? Also if we heard a sound in the forest like a tree falling , do we assume a tree has fallen, not having actually seen the tree fall. Also if we did see a tree fall and did not hear a sound , do we then assume the tree did not fall or maybe we are just plain deaf.
So, that brings me to my next point .....or never mind, you fuckers aren't there and nobody's reading this , cause I can't see any of you right now .
Ah , yes , a re-union. That would be fun. Maybe sometime next year.
What say you guys, maybe 2006 Christmas.
DB - Sorry here too. Could have had a meal at your expense as Slob puts it. Here in Bombay, most of these office - going yuppies need to show what workaholics they are.
I have been to Delhi on office work and have never had a chance to unwind. Its always airport- taxi- office - pizza for lunch - office - postpone flight - office - taxi- airport - home.
Dome/DB - my experiences of travelling out of Mumbai on work were totally different. Even though the down side of travelling was you never knew when you were coming back ( cant count the number of times I have purchased toothbrushes and extra jocks ) , but over all we used to have plenty of time to unwind and boy ! did we unwind. Our unwinding would start at 7pm and end in the wee hours. One time I remember we went directly from a bar to breakfast at the hotel and straight to office in the same clothes . It was quite a laugh when we trooped in to office wearing the same clothes.
But there is one regret I have - we had gone to Agra for two days on a managers meet and were so busy I did not get a chance to see the Taj. Unbelievable !
Osho - whatcha talking about - not mentioning names. Since NZ is two weeks behind in the screenings of RockINXS , you guys fucked it up for me by not mentioning names , but clearly indicating who you were talking about.
Osho,
Mumbai was hectic, rainy and hectic. I have a job! The upside/downside is that my main portfolio is now "training".... five landmark stores and 19 westside stores thrown in for good measure!
I have been given a year to review the westside operations etc., before I actually have to get actively involved (start bullshitting) in the WS bit.
By that time LM and WS would have added 3 more stores each.
I have committed to travel at least 180 days a year, so you won't be seeing much of me in the future.
I have signed the TATA Code of Conduct! This is a document you must read!
Looks like everybody has fucked off to Mt Tremblant.
PF , good work on the George Jennings ph no.
Albeit way behind your deadline, but anyway, now it remains for you to contact him and get his ass on the blog. Also please inform him his blog name shall be "martyr".
He and the other gaandus will know why.
Hello Fucks..sorry folks,
PF - Good work! You finding Matyr.
Now, get him on the blog!
Lund- if you want to lick willy while he's on a rise well that's your business. You tax fuckers never give up do you? My taxes are all paid and my books are in order and still you're whining for "cha pani"! But on a more serious note, if you want to bum a treat I think you're barking up the wrong tree!Read on
CS - It's obvious you have not bothered to read the Khanki Rules and Regulations 2005. Let me quote Rule number 420/1D
When any khanki becomes a BIG SHOT [incl.DIRECTOR/Vice President (one party due here)/any other designation that Pat Eaton will not believe] he/she/it must declare openly and truthfully, on this blog, that this is the case.
Subsection 1 :Though some bhooka khankis will beg for a treat(the Tax department brainwashes them into assuming that they must get a part of everybody's good fortune and fruits of hard work), the rest of the khankis will forward their admiration and congratulations. Subsection 2(or is it ii):Those who are able to attend, should be invited for a lavish celebration. Khankis in other parts of the world should be sent a few hundred dollars to have a small party in your honour.
Naughty Benny (ancient latin/greek legal terminology for "N.B./ "please note"/"Now hear dis") :The penalty for not doing so is castration.
P.S.(ancient latin/greek legal terminology for Psssst!)As in your case this penalty is posing great problem I would like to suggest you make declaration, organise party and send money immediately to avoid great big blogspot jhaamaela!
P.P.S.(ancient latin/greek legal terminology for "Oh Fuck! I almost forgot!") CONGRATS!
New entry in Nostalgia Contd. Its about DD once again.
Any of you guys interested in F1.
Yesterday's race in Suzuka, Japan was one of the best this season .
Blistering overtaking runs by Alonso and finally the last 3 laps where Raikonnen caught up with Fisichella and won the race.
Awesome stuff.
Osho, never apologise for something you are interested in, even if others are not. Remember this is the "ADDA" thread , where we can discuss, debate, argue or generally shoot the breeze about anything.
Looking forward to tomorrow's race.
Even though Barichello won it last year , this time its gonna be the Renaults and the MacLarens once again. I just hope Montoya fairs well , he's my favourite driver and hasn't had a good season.
Also will be looking to see where Karthikeyan ends up.
BTW, who are the AI drivers for India ?
Osho (pampamparaaah!!!),
Good fix for F1 withdrawal...check out the auto ride from Park circus to Dharamtalla....it's gonna be a long time before F1 or A1 can top that ride for thrills.
DB, you can say that again.
Thanks O Grand Master of de Blog!
Osho (Pampamparaaah!)
Good fix for F1 withdrawal...check out the auto ride from Park circus to Dharamtalla....it's gonna be a long time before F1 or A1 can top that ride for thrills.
Where is everyone?
Banglu
Send any mails you want to walter.phillips@gmail.com or, to walter.phillips@indiatimes.com
I prefer the gmail a/c.
Office email is strictly monitored.
Osho, today's the A1 GP in Portugal. Looking forward to it. Even if does not meet the statndard of F1 , at least its something to watch in the meanwhile. Will be rooting for Karun Chandok ( India ) and Johnny Reid ( NZ ). NZ by the way is ranked 3rd in the tabs.
Check out this Mad Max type katwa- Akbarbhai. I'd bet his auto would out strip any of these F1 or A1 buggers.
I bet Chandok could never take the "Bata mor" on two wheels,negotiating the tram lines against the flow of traffic...that too with "Dil to Pagal Hai" playing way above the decibel limit, as he yells out to Nasir bhai(doing the same thing in the opposite direction)"Abbey Gaandu, khabbadaar! laurah Saargaet khara hai! Uska ma ka bur!"
Slobsworld has been updated.
Raise your dicks - I mean glasses ,that was the 200th post in this thread.
Dusty, you ball faced khunt, you're right , the autos in Cal will give these A1 drivers a run for their money.
Even the ones in Mumbai are terrific. There you'll hear things like ," Abe saale launde , bageecha mei chal raha hai , kya , bhenchod."
Hey, hey hey hey.....where the fuck is everybody ????
Have you guys dud a hole and buried yourselves or what !
Hey Dome, can u send me an invite to open a gmail a/c.
Hi everybody. Slob, your invite has been sent. All you BCDAS abroad, send me your exact residential addresses please, I want to show my son where you all stay using Google Earth, right down to the exact street. Awesome stuff!
Slob nice snaps on your blog. Millie's looking great for such an advanced state of pregnancy.
Texy, this is the second reminder to update your blog, we want to SEE something other than your name. PF why so quiet for so long?
Dear Grandmaster of de blog,
This is a serious situation! Every time I visit the blog I am infromed that today is Errol's birthday... now obviously this is very depressing. Ever since you put that shit up everyone seems to have pissed off!!!
Now maybe they've all gone to Angie's/Azizia's/Chulia's in the hopes that Slob will show up to pay for the tea...but with his rep that's highly unlikely.
Even the normally chirpy buggers like Bungloo and PF are silent.
There's absolutely no adda on ADDA and Osho (pampamparaah!!)has fucked up Nostalgia cont., by steering the conversation to quizzes and so on....dees ees hees old habit!
This is a genuine bitching and moaning session and on behalf of all parachutes I demand that you take the strictest action against all the bastids that have been avoiding to make contact with us. I have not had a good side splitting laugh in a while now.
Either we have run out of material or (more likely)all the gaandus have become lazy!!
Bokachodas say something ok?
DB, you are absolutely right! Just thought that RLD banners shud be on for about 10 days, just incase some lazy khankis havent been checking the blog. Shall move it right away.
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